For those of you who have been following my work for some time now, you’ve seen that I’ve been inconsistent with when I post and what I post about.
Maybe you haven’t noticed. Maybe you’ve just found my work. Allow me to give some context.
I officially launched my blog in 2015. As someone who was not privy to blogs prior to then, I researched other blogs that brought a lot of traffic to learn from the best. I decided to mimic their approach.
This led to my content looking like a cooking blog and a sewing blog even though it was intended to be a self-help blog.
In the midst of that, I was wrestling with the idea of not making my writing seem “too Godly.”
What would people think?
Would I turn people off?
Both of those questions were continuously wrapped in my thoughts. It made me question each post that I wrote and continuously feel like something was missing.
This ultimately got me to where I am now – unsure of my intended audience and my original purpose. Consequently, I haven’t written a single thing in months.
The other day, I cried out to God.
“Lord, I feel so unsettled. Why can’t I simply write? What is holding me back from what I know I’m supposed to be doing? My burden is heavy right now. I’m seeking your guidance. Amen.”
It was then that I heard His response. He told me that I was running from acknowledging Him. And He was right!
Rather than trying to be who God called me to be and write what God has placed in my heart, I was trying to appeal to a culture and a comfort that I wasn’t meant to satisfy.
That’s why I’ve been unsettled. That’s why it got heavy. That’s why I haven’t been confident in my work.
Now, I immediately wanted to feel like so much time has been wasted because of my avoidance, but I had to realize that God’s timing is perfect. When I consider other things happening in my life right now, this really is the perfect time for me to adjust course in my writing.
The only thing I can satisfy is my authenticity. That may show up in my writing in ways that will be uncomfortable and raw even for me, but that’s what I KNOW I’m supposed to write about. That’s what will set me free from the heavy burdens I’ve created for myself.
Maybe you’re also at a place where you’re feeling unsettled and stagnant. God will speak to you in unexpected ways, just as He did for me. When He does, it will change your entire trajectory.
Here’s to a new season of writing and a new season of submitting to God’s will. I pray that He will use this blog as a vehicle for speaking in your life!